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BusinessCommission Jokes

Best Sales Commission Jokes, Part One

By June 16, 2020 No Comments

Stressing the end of the sales commission cycle? Maybe you’re tensing up as you think about all that time you’ll be spending staring at spreadsheets and collecting data. You’ve got piles of statements and records to convert, dozens of payees to email, and so many reports to build. Core Commissions is here for you.

We can do two things to help you out. First: we’ve got an application that can simplify sales commission management. Easy statement conversions, reliable commission rules engine, and one-click commission processing. It will save you hours, even days of weeding through the calculations. The application even generates individualized reports and emails them to each of your payees.

A woman stands in front of a chalkboard covered in mathematical formulas calculating sales commission

Core can help with commission calculations but we’ve also got jokes!

Second? We can tell you commission jokes! Nothing like a little laughter to relieve that stress. 

Why won’t a commission administrator ever pay a commission of $288?

  • Because it’s two gross.

A commission administrator is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. 

  • “Doctor, I just can’t get to sleep at night.” 
  • “Have you tried counting sheep?” 
  • “That’s the problem—I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.”

How do you know skunks are bad at sales?

  • They only make one scent.

A farmer has an old sheepdog that dies suddenly … 

  • So he needs to go buy a new one to round up his sheep. 
  • He goes to the local pet store and sees a few, but none that stand out. 
  • He asks the clerk for something better, and he takes the farmer into a back room with one sheepdog wearing a cap and gown. 
  • He goes over to the dog and asks him “Can you round up my sheep?” 
  • The dog replies “Sir. I have a masters in mathematics and PHD in statistics. I am more than confident that I can round up your sheep for you.” 
  • The farmer is impressed and takes him home that day. 
  • When it’s time for the sheep to come in from the pasture, the farmer goes to the dog and says “Alright sport, please round up the 98 sheep I have in this pasture.” 
  • The dog replies “Easy. You have 100 sheep”

Core: “Our application will cut your workload by 50%.”

  • Commission Administrator: “That’s great! I’ll take two!”

Okay, you might be more interested in our first offer. So drop us a line and we’ll help you out. We’ll be here all week!

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